5. BRYAN FERRY "The 'In' Crowd"
Byron Ferrari is BACK! Shorn temporarily of Roxy Music, this is Bryan committing full-on, all-out, balls to the wall to his lounge lizard persona - a bit of an odd jump for the undeniably working class miner's son, and therefore one that needs this level of absolute commitment; living the gimmick, like a suave, sophisticated Undertaker.
Once again this is a cover, which shows how many of the iconic songs of this era were repurposed from older days, but it's made so much the artist's own that I find it impossible to associate it with anyone else. Mind you, Ferry was really pumping out the covers at this stage; indeed, his first two solo albums are entirely composed of covers, which would be an unusual step nowadays. Back then? Not so much.
The only further thing I would say is that it's an odd inclusion given we could have had another Roxy Music one on here instead - "Love Is The Drug", anyone? Or do I just like that because Kylie covered it? - but by odd, by no means do I mean unwelcome.
6. PATTI SMITH "Piss Factory"
Get down and get with it, for this uptempo toe-tapper about... Erm... A urine manufacturing plant? OK, whatever.
Given that this is piss-weak performance poetry - hey, maybe that's what the factory was manufacturing? I mean, she *did* work there and all - I nodded off a couple of times throughout and thought it best to have a read of the lyrics. And my interpretation thereof comes down, in essence, to this:
* Patti has a job;
* Patti does not like the job;
* Patti wishes to tell her superiors to stick said job;
* Patti is moving to New York to be a star.
Well, good for Patti. Fingers crossed for Patti. Patti can also fuck right off. I'm bloody sick of hearing creative types banging on about escaping the nine to five - Sleater-Kinney were the last band to annoy me with that behaviour, and their records have been banished to the 'Never Play' list.
Because whilst some may hear this as a clarion call, an example to impressionable young minds to jack it all in, move to a now-unsustainable life in a huge urban sprawl and try desperately to be noticed, an ant in a pile of identical ants, I only see the intense patronisation of the 'normal' human life in a capitalist society; the idea that they're all squares, wage slaves, salarymen and women, propping up the machine, maaan.
Some of us don't have the opportunity to leave the piss factory, Patti. Still more only get as far as the piss office or the piss shop. A few of us run our own piss businesses, some get stuck on the piss dole, a lucky few might get enough piss qualifications to go and work at the piss hospital or fly a piss plane. And none of them are any better or worse than you, in your piss band with your pretentious poetry and your eventual pop sellout.
And the song? Well, that's the only thing that isn't piss in this whole affair. It's shit.
Ahem. Rant over. Time to get off my piss soapbox and back to the music.
7. COCKNEY REBEL "Tumbling Down"
A much more engaging and heartfelt entry than when last we joined them just two short posts ago (keep up, slowpokes!), "Tumbling Down" is sonically much closer to the one Cockney Rebel song everyone remembers, "Make Me Smile (Come Up And See Me)", although by the time that was recorded the band was shorn of most personnel aside from Steve Harley.
I thought I had heard this light, dramatic, mournful offering before, but couldn't place where. Turns out it's one of the songs they used in flop glam retrospective drama "Velvet Goldmine", for the 'Bowie' character who isn't Bowie because he refused to let them use his name or songs. Nice to know someone profited from that particular opportunity!
8. THE GLITTER BAND "Angel Face"
"#Gary Glitter, he's a bad bad man/ruining the reputation of The Glitter Band..." - Luke Haines, "Bad Reputation"
Ah. It seems, both inevitably and unfortunately, that we have reached the point where we can no longer avoid dredging up that name. A bold choice by the compiler then, though we must bear in mind that The Glitter Band (formerly The Glittermen, latterly The G Band) were the person in question's live backing band only, with the records being handled separately to all members save occasional interjections from the horn section.
And you know what, this song isn't bad at all. It's very glam-by-numbers, but in doing so it hits all the right places - it may be overtly familiar as a genre piece, but it's a superior offering, clearly made by more-than-competent musicians, so it's never a chore to listen to.
But let this be a lesson to all of us to choose your friends, and where possible your collaborators and colleagues, very carefully - lest you be caught in the fallout of fatally toxic reputational damage. Still, "Goodbye My Love": it's a hell of a record...
Join us next time for some foxy goings-on, a ton of greasepaint and an example of the Japanese getting it very, very wrong.
Thursday, June 30, 2016
Thursday, June 23, 2016
Everybody Up! 10 - The Jook's On You
DISK THREE
1. SPARKS "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us"
Now, THIS is music. Genuinely startlingly fantastic - although some of that startling comes from the gunshot sound effect right near the start, that after so many listens as to count as near-infinite, I still for some reason am not ever expecting, causing me to leap out of my skin in public on a regular basis, to my eternal embarrassment.
The music twists, turns and trills through a number of genuinely unexpected and compelling episodes, with Russell Mael's voice soaring majestically above it, conveying the snowballing desperation of the protagonist.
Anyone who thinks pop music cannot be ambitious, intelligent or challenging needs to have this injected into their brain as abruptly as possible; for that is exactly what this is: pop with a brain, heart and balls, streets ahead of today's non-stop parade of hyper-sexualised R and/or B.
There's every risk our children's children will never experience the rush of hearing new music with this heady combination. Surely, we can't let things go this way? Surely better heads must prevail, and turn back the tide of disposable pop?
In short: won't somebody please think of the children?
2. HELLO "Tell Him"
Is there a less imaginative band name than this? (Yes: "The Band", you fucking idiot - Ed)
Heralded by about the most identikit glam rock intro ever, this is a cover of a 1963 song by a band by the name of The Exciters. And... It's OK. It's a good song, but maybe the performance and the sideways shift into a very regimented glam rhythm has damaged it a little, as the original song is actually pretty damn good, but really suits the more spacious arrangement, and this just doesn't work quite as well.
In fact, why not just listen to the original. You can thank me later:
Here's one for you, though: we'll be hearing another Hello song later, but not their version thereof. See if you can spot it.
3. MUD "Tiger Feet"
Now here's a track you'll often find on glam/70's/classic rock/dad compilations, so it's only appropriate that I type this on Father's Day. Hello, Paul, if you're reading this. I'm going to wager that you don't like this song.
If I'm rambling on about things other than the song, you'll already know that I have naff all to say about this one. I think it's due to the repeated inclusion on compilations, and television programmes about the best and worst of the 70's, that I'm suffering from Tiger Feet apathy, unable to add anything of interest about it - we all surely know there was a special dance, for instance.
So I'm going to rip off the fact from the (very nice, classy) book that accompanies the compilation, as it's quite an interesting one: the song was written by glam rock writers de jour Nicky Chinn and Mike Chapman, keeping another of their songs (The Sweet's "Teenage Rampage") off the top spot, and eventually being replaced by "Devil Gate Drive" - performed by Suzi Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink, but written by, you guessed it, Chinn and Chapman. There's nice for them.
4. THE JOOK "Bish Bash Bosh"
I'm not familiar with the kind of thing I just typed; I don't even know those words, but in a different order... Well, maybe "bash". So I've experienced something new today. Usually good when that happens.
OK, let's dive in with both feet... "#She's sweet sixteen"? Well that's a bit of a bad first line, particularly in context of later events. That the ensuing song appears to be about "easy" girls really doesn't help its case, and the sub-Status Quo racket that accompanies it fails to snap, crackle and pop in any meaningful way.
This does appear to be considered a 'proto-punk' record in hindsight, but it fails to chime with me I fear; however, to give us an excellently odd full circle moment, it appears that two members of this band went on to join - wait for it - Sparks! So that town really wasn't big enough for both of them... (cymbal crash, groans)
Join us next time when, having executed our closing joke-writers, we will meet Byron Ferrari once again, visit a piss factory and try not to mention you-know-who.
1. SPARKS "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us"
Now, THIS is music. Genuinely startlingly fantastic - although some of that startling comes from the gunshot sound effect right near the start, that after so many listens as to count as near-infinite, I still for some reason am not ever expecting, causing me to leap out of my skin in public on a regular basis, to my eternal embarrassment.
The music twists, turns and trills through a number of genuinely unexpected and compelling episodes, with Russell Mael's voice soaring majestically above it, conveying the snowballing desperation of the protagonist.
Anyone who thinks pop music cannot be ambitious, intelligent or challenging needs to have this injected into their brain as abruptly as possible; for that is exactly what this is: pop with a brain, heart and balls, streets ahead of today's non-stop parade of hyper-sexualised R and/or B.
There's every risk our children's children will never experience the rush of hearing new music with this heady combination. Surely, we can't let things go this way? Surely better heads must prevail, and turn back the tide of disposable pop?
In short: won't somebody please think of the children?
2. HELLO "Tell Him"
Is there a less imaginative band name than this? (Yes: "The Band", you fucking idiot - Ed)
Heralded by about the most identikit glam rock intro ever, this is a cover of a 1963 song by a band by the name of The Exciters. And... It's OK. It's a good song, but maybe the performance and the sideways shift into a very regimented glam rhythm has damaged it a little, as the original song is actually pretty damn good, but really suits the more spacious arrangement, and this just doesn't work quite as well.
In fact, why not just listen to the original. You can thank me later:
Here's one for you, though: we'll be hearing another Hello song later, but not their version thereof. See if you can spot it.
3. MUD "Tiger Feet"
Now here's a track you'll often find on glam/70's/classic rock/dad compilations, so it's only appropriate that I type this on Father's Day. Hello, Paul, if you're reading this. I'm going to wager that you don't like this song.
If I'm rambling on about things other than the song, you'll already know that I have naff all to say about this one. I think it's due to the repeated inclusion on compilations, and television programmes about the best and worst of the 70's, that I'm suffering from Tiger Feet apathy, unable to add anything of interest about it - we all surely know there was a special dance, for instance.
So I'm going to rip off the fact from the (very nice, classy) book that accompanies the compilation, as it's quite an interesting one: the song was written by glam rock writers de jour Nicky Chinn and Mike Chapman, keeping another of their songs (The Sweet's "Teenage Rampage") off the top spot, and eventually being replaced by "Devil Gate Drive" - performed by Suzi Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink, but written by, you guessed it, Chinn and Chapman. There's nice for them.
4. THE JOOK "Bish Bash Bosh"
I'm not familiar with the kind of thing I just typed; I don't even know those words, but in a different order... Well, maybe "bash". So I've experienced something new today. Usually good when that happens.
OK, let's dive in with both feet... "#She's sweet sixteen"? Well that's a bit of a bad first line, particularly in context of later events. That the ensuing song appears to be about "easy" girls really doesn't help its case, and the sub-Status Quo racket that accompanies it fails to snap, crackle and pop in any meaningful way.
This does appear to be considered a 'proto-punk' record in hindsight, but it fails to chime with me I fear; however, to give us an excellently odd full circle moment, it appears that two members of this band went on to join - wait for it - Sparks! So that town really wasn't big enough for both of them... (cymbal crash, groans)
Join us next time when, having executed our closing joke-writers, we will meet Byron Ferrari once again, visit a piss factory and try not to mention you-know-who.
Thursday, June 16, 2016
Everybody Up! 9 - In Which Bowie Is Covered, Yet Again
16. ALVIN STARDUST "My Coo Ca Choo"
Now here's a name you never see anymore. Dare I say that, as one of the people most synonymous with the genre, he may have been a victim of the public's extremely justified horror around the actions of a fellow high-profile glam rocker.
It is a shame really, as Mr Stardust - not that one - was a magnetic figure at the time, and actually did good business on the nostalgia circuit up until his inevitable end. Ignoring for a second that this record isn't actually performed by him (apparently he wasn't the first Alvin Stardust OR the first Shane Fenton), it is an iconic hit that will forever be associated with the man himself, whoever in fact he is.
I am therefore happy to report that this is a cracking tune. A great little groove here, admittedly repetitive, but when you have bare bones this good there's no point in shoving extraneous sections in to make it more 'interesting' - it's interesting enough as it is. More like this, please!
17. LULU "The Man Who Sold The World"
Alright, let's be as fair as we can be about this: this version was about as Bowie-endorsed as it possibly could be, so there was some quality control going on. The public certainly liked it, the single peaking at number 3 in the UK. And - importantly - it's better and less disposable than Dana Gillespie's "Andy Warhol" from two entries ago.
The main problem isn't even that the Bowie version is better, although at the time arguably not better known, than this one; it's those bloody Nirvana scamps who retrospectively made a rock for this version's back.
For when a certain blue-eyed, charmingly vulnerable, unwilling poster boy for a somewhat greasy-haired generation gazed up into the camera, acoustic guitar on lap (though it was creating a suspiciously fuzzbox-ish sound at the time), and a hundred thousand hearts broke for the tragic creature for whom fame was just too cruel, Lulu's version was pinned with a 3rd place ribbon and handed its metaphorical coat.
Does the job, though. And it's better than Midge Ure's version.
18. MICK RONSON "Growing Up And I'm Fine"
In recent documentaries about the end of the Spiders From Mars, it was said that Mick Ronson was, if not in on it, then at least aware of Bowie's planned announcement of the end of the band that fateful night at the Hammersmith Odeon. He was allegedly asked to keep quiet on a promise that his career would get the Bowie treatment next - the sky's the limit, fame and fortune, and so forth.
For whatever reason that didn't quite work out, to the point where even a Bowie obsessive such as myself had not found his output high-profile enough to have a listen to. Reader: based on this evidence, I was a fool. A fully justified, extremely handsome fool.
It's brilliant, to the point where my jaw legitimately dropped on first listen. From the low-key piano intro, through Ronson's tale of moving on from his years as a teenage ne'er-do-well with the power of love, into a stomping chorus worthy of the closing titles of... Something. Anything, surely - this is sheer, unadulterated class. Seek it out.
19. COCKNEY REBEL "Judy Teen"
In an odd phenomenon that often happens when I listen to music of a certain vintage, I spent a fair while wondering what this had ripped off that I already knew, and realised it was two songs that were released after this one! Bloody time, eh? Flexing like a whore...
(Hang on, that's not on this album. Damn. It should be.)
The verse of this song that is essentially Adam And The Ants' "Prince Charming" with a slight calypso lilt, and there are shades of the vocal delivery in These Animal Men's "New Wave Girl", probably my least favourite song by that particular combo.
It's a bit of a whimper to end a disk on, and one that's been pretty damn solid all in all. However we will be hearing from Cockney Rebel again soon, one of only two complete acts to make two appearances (T. Rex being the other), so they will have a chance to atone for their mediocrity. Otherwise I can think of a certain Rock 'n' Roll Hall that will be accepting them very soon.
End of Disk Two! At this point we're largely through the "pure glam" section, and with approximately 60% of the collection left, we've doubtlessly got a few surprises coming up. So please join us, why not, for the next instalment!
Disk two is in the books! Join us next time for the start to disk three, which features "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us" by Sparks. And nothing else it contains can possibly matter, as it features "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us" by Sparks.
Now here's a name you never see anymore. Dare I say that, as one of the people most synonymous with the genre, he may have been a victim of the public's extremely justified horror around the actions of a fellow high-profile glam rocker.
It is a shame really, as Mr Stardust - not that one - was a magnetic figure at the time, and actually did good business on the nostalgia circuit up until his inevitable end. Ignoring for a second that this record isn't actually performed by him (apparently he wasn't the first Alvin Stardust OR the first Shane Fenton), it is an iconic hit that will forever be associated with the man himself, whoever in fact he is.
I am therefore happy to report that this is a cracking tune. A great little groove here, admittedly repetitive, but when you have bare bones this good there's no point in shoving extraneous sections in to make it more 'interesting' - it's interesting enough as it is. More like this, please!
17. LULU "The Man Who Sold The World"
Alright, let's be as fair as we can be about this: this version was about as Bowie-endorsed as it possibly could be, so there was some quality control going on. The public certainly liked it, the single peaking at number 3 in the UK. And - importantly - it's better and less disposable than Dana Gillespie's "Andy Warhol" from two entries ago.
The main problem isn't even that the Bowie version is better, although at the time arguably not better known, than this one; it's those bloody Nirvana scamps who retrospectively made a rock for this version's back.
For when a certain blue-eyed, charmingly vulnerable, unwilling poster boy for a somewhat greasy-haired generation gazed up into the camera, acoustic guitar on lap (though it was creating a suspiciously fuzzbox-ish sound at the time), and a hundred thousand hearts broke for the tragic creature for whom fame was just too cruel, Lulu's version was pinned with a 3rd place ribbon and handed its metaphorical coat.
Does the job, though. And it's better than Midge Ure's version.
18. MICK RONSON "Growing Up And I'm Fine"
In recent documentaries about the end of the Spiders From Mars, it was said that Mick Ronson was, if not in on it, then at least aware of Bowie's planned announcement of the end of the band that fateful night at the Hammersmith Odeon. He was allegedly asked to keep quiet on a promise that his career would get the Bowie treatment next - the sky's the limit, fame and fortune, and so forth.
For whatever reason that didn't quite work out, to the point where even a Bowie obsessive such as myself had not found his output high-profile enough to have a listen to. Reader: based on this evidence, I was a fool. A fully justified, extremely handsome fool.
It's brilliant, to the point where my jaw legitimately dropped on first listen. From the low-key piano intro, through Ronson's tale of moving on from his years as a teenage ne'er-do-well with the power of love, into a stomping chorus worthy of the closing titles of... Something. Anything, surely - this is sheer, unadulterated class. Seek it out.
19. COCKNEY REBEL "Judy Teen"
In an odd phenomenon that often happens when I listen to music of a certain vintage, I spent a fair while wondering what this had ripped off that I already knew, and realised it was two songs that were released after this one! Bloody time, eh? Flexing like a whore...
(Hang on, that's not on this album. Damn. It should be.)
The verse of this song that is essentially Adam And The Ants' "Prince Charming" with a slight calypso lilt, and there are shades of the vocal delivery in These Animal Men's "New Wave Girl", probably my least favourite song by that particular combo.
It's a bit of a whimper to end a disk on, and one that's been pretty damn solid all in all. However we will be hearing from Cockney Rebel again soon, one of only two complete acts to make two appearances (T. Rex being the other), so they will have a chance to atone for their mediocrity. Otherwise I can think of a certain Rock 'n' Roll Hall that will be accepting them very soon.
End of Disk Two! At this point we're largely through the "pure glam" section, and with approximately 60% of the collection left, we've doubtlessly got a few surprises coming up. So please join us, why not, for the next instalment!
Disk two is in the books! Join us next time for the start to disk three, which features "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us" by Sparks. And nothing else it contains can possibly matter, as it features "This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us" by Sparks.
Monday, June 13, 2016
Looks Unfamiliar - Hear Me Speak!
Looks Unfamiliar is the new podcast from writer and broadcaster Tim Worthington, where he discusses things that his guests think are obscure enough that only they have experienced them. He was nice enough to ask me to do one, and lo and behold, Episode 2 duly features me.
So like an Action Man with a pulled string, I can be found making noise here. Amongst other things I discuss a unfairly-shelved crisp flavour, an insensitive wrestling faction and a range of toys with absolutely terrifying implications.
Despite me showing my control of the internet by linking straight to the source, you should also go to the index of The Benatical, TV's Ben Baker's home of quality audio produce, because you might just see other things you like on there.
And you will - New Chart Riot with Ben and Phil Catterall is a... Well, a riot, for a start. And whilst not (currently) seasonally appropriate, Ben and Tim's Advent Calendar is a similar rush.
So get over there, and have a look. Go on, it won't kill you!*
* = not a guarantee.
So like an Action Man with a pulled string, I can be found making noise here. Amongst other things I discuss a unfairly-shelved crisp flavour, an insensitive wrestling faction and a range of toys with absolutely terrifying implications.
Despite me showing my control of the internet by linking straight to the source, you should also go to the index of The Benatical, TV's Ben Baker's home of quality audio produce, because you might just see other things you like on there.
And you will - New Chart Riot with Ben and Phil Catterall is a... Well, a riot, for a start. And whilst not (currently) seasonally appropriate, Ben and Tim's Advent Calendar is a similar rush.
So get over there, and have a look. Go on, it won't kill you!*
* = not a guarantee.
Thursday, June 09, 2016
Everybody Up! 8 - You Can Miss This One Out If You Want
11. COZY POWELL "Dance With The Devil"
I'll level with you, I am not looking forward to this little run. There will be a LOT of Wikipedia'ing required here, and the result will look every bit as half-arsed as it actually is. I'm happy for you to wait this one out and tune back in next week - seriously. I'll wait for everyone to file out...
...
...
...
...
Right, here goes nothing.
Featuring an intro that always annoys me, as if I'm only half listening I think it's "Rasputin" by Boney M, which is a song that is better than this song by an amount that the English language simply doesn't have a word for, this also contains huge chunks of Jimi Hendrix's majestic "Third Stone From The Sun". Oh, and apparently Suzi Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink is the bass player on this track, but that might be Wikipedia pulling my leg again.
The problem with this is that it's all utterly, utterly unnecessary - if I wanted to listen to something that had the riff from "Third Stone From The Sun" on it, I'd listen to "Third Stone From The Sun". Actually, I do. I do want that. So that's exactly what I'm going to do. See you in seven minutes.
12. DAVID ESSEX "Rock On"
Rock off. I'm still listening to Hendrix.
13. WIZZARD "Angel Fingers (A Teen Ballad)"
Ah-ha! The classic sound of Christmas. Yule logs, turkey with all the trimmings, hanging up your stockings on the wall - hang on, that's the other one - Meccano under the tree, rationing, the three-day week, Apple Macs, the workhouse, "here's Hurst, he might make it three. He has! He has - so that's it. That is IT!", Australia's stolen generations, Hungry Hungry Hippos, "Beneath The Valley Of The Ultravixens"... (NOTE: your childhood Christmases may vary)
What do you mean, it's not that one? What do you mean, it's a classic example of how pop culture was already riffing on the fifties when it had only just finished? What do you mean, it appears to contain several bars of the theme tune from "Red Dwarf", years before "Loving The Alien" did the same? And it was replaced at number one by "Eye Level" - the theme from "Van Der Valk"?
Ah, nuts. I can't catch a break today.
14. ELTON JOHN "Bennie And The Jets"
FINALLY! A track I'm more than familiar with (cheers, mum), and more importantly, an artist I don't bloody have to research! Right, the gloves are off - here we go with a classic piece of writing.
The artist known as Elton John was born Harry Rodger Webb in India on 14 October 1940.
In 1948, the Webb family moved to Carshalton, where young Elton became interested in skiffle music.
He entered the Vienna Music Conservatory in 1977, but left after one semester to "become a real musician", joining a jazz-rock group in West Berlin, and playing in the Austrian bands Spinning Wheel and Hallucination Company.
In 2003 he was given a race seat at Jaguar, but after disappointing in the role he lost his seat to Justin Wilson and returned to Williams as a test driver. Here he would find his greatest success, whilst filling in for injured drivers Ralf Schumacher and Nick Heidfeld over the course of the next two seasons, gaining a career total of eight points.
Since then he has found some success as a comedy actor, most natbly in two seasons of "Hyperdrive", and was most recently seen by cinema audiences in 2016's "The Huntsman: Winter's War". And somewhere in the middle of all that he released "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road", "Crocodile Rock" and "I'm Still Standing", all of which are better than this over-long piece.
(And I mean both the song and this awful attempt at comedy. A point to anyone who can identify all of the people I'm actually talking about.)
15. BARRY BLUE "Dancin' (On A Saturday Night)"
I'm sure Barry Blue was the name of a novelty elephant-themed dessert available at Masterchef on Renshaw Street, Liverpool. Anyone else remember that incredibly specific reference?
No?
Well you can all fuck off, then.
Seriously, can you not just pretend to take an interest in my life? It's always you, you, you (and also some glam rock reviews). I have feelings! I am a man! I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does!
Actually, that gives me a great idea - I'll listen to "How Soon Is Now" instead of this garbage.
Our apologies for this frankly substandard instalment of "Everybody Up!". By way of compensation, we present this picture of a weasel:
Please don't be discouraged from joining us next time when, after a heavy dose of happy pills, your esteemed writer will return to plunge a dagger into the heart of disk two. This will feature a great track by one of music's greatest lieutenants, and... Some other stuff. Peace out!
I'll level with you, I am not looking forward to this little run. There will be a LOT of Wikipedia'ing required here, and the result will look every bit as half-arsed as it actually is. I'm happy for you to wait this one out and tune back in next week - seriously. I'll wait for everyone to file out...
...
...
...
...
Right, here goes nothing.
Featuring an intro that always annoys me, as if I'm only half listening I think it's "Rasputin" by Boney M, which is a song that is better than this song by an amount that the English language simply doesn't have a word for, this also contains huge chunks of Jimi Hendrix's majestic "Third Stone From The Sun". Oh, and apparently Suzi Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink is the bass player on this track, but that might be Wikipedia pulling my leg again.
The problem with this is that it's all utterly, utterly unnecessary - if I wanted to listen to something that had the riff from "Third Stone From The Sun" on it, I'd listen to "Third Stone From The Sun". Actually, I do. I do want that. So that's exactly what I'm going to do. See you in seven minutes.
12. DAVID ESSEX "Rock On"
Rock off. I'm still listening to Hendrix.
13. WIZZARD "Angel Fingers (A Teen Ballad)"
Ah-ha! The classic sound of Christmas. Yule logs, turkey with all the trimmings, hanging up your stockings on the wall - hang on, that's the other one - Meccano under the tree, rationing, the three-day week, Apple Macs, the workhouse, "here's Hurst, he might make it three. He has! He has - so that's it. That is IT!", Australia's stolen generations, Hungry Hungry Hippos, "Beneath The Valley Of The Ultravixens"... (NOTE: your childhood Christmases may vary)
What do you mean, it's not that one? What do you mean, it's a classic example of how pop culture was already riffing on the fifties when it had only just finished? What do you mean, it appears to contain several bars of the theme tune from "Red Dwarf", years before "Loving The Alien" did the same? And it was replaced at number one by "Eye Level" - the theme from "Van Der Valk"?
Ah, nuts. I can't catch a break today.
14. ELTON JOHN "Bennie And The Jets"
FINALLY! A track I'm more than familiar with (cheers, mum), and more importantly, an artist I don't bloody have to research! Right, the gloves are off - here we go with a classic piece of writing.
The artist known as Elton John was born Harry Rodger Webb in India on 14 October 1940.
In 1948, the Webb family moved to Carshalton, where young Elton became interested in skiffle music.
He entered the Vienna Music Conservatory in 1977, but left after one semester to "become a real musician", joining a jazz-rock group in West Berlin, and playing in the Austrian bands Spinning Wheel and Hallucination Company.
In 2003 he was given a race seat at Jaguar, but after disappointing in the role he lost his seat to Justin Wilson and returned to Williams as a test driver. Here he would find his greatest success, whilst filling in for injured drivers Ralf Schumacher and Nick Heidfeld over the course of the next two seasons, gaining a career total of eight points.
Since then he has found some success as a comedy actor, most natbly in two seasons of "Hyperdrive", and was most recently seen by cinema audiences in 2016's "The Huntsman: Winter's War". And somewhere in the middle of all that he released "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road", "Crocodile Rock" and "I'm Still Standing", all of which are better than this over-long piece.
(And I mean both the song and this awful attempt at comedy. A point to anyone who can identify all of the people I'm actually talking about.)
15. BARRY BLUE "Dancin' (On A Saturday Night)"
I'm sure Barry Blue was the name of a novelty elephant-themed dessert available at Masterchef on Renshaw Street, Liverpool. Anyone else remember that incredibly specific reference?
No?
Well you can all fuck off, then.
Seriously, can you not just pretend to take an interest in my life? It's always you, you, you (and also some glam rock reviews). I have feelings! I am a man! I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does!
Actually, that gives me a great idea - I'll listen to "How Soon Is Now" instead of this garbage.
Our apologies for this frankly substandard instalment of "Everybody Up!". By way of compensation, we present this picture of a weasel:
Please don't be discouraged from joining us next time when, after a heavy dose of happy pills, your esteemed writer will return to plunge a dagger into the heart of disk two. This will feature a great track by one of music's greatest lieutenants, and... Some other stuff. Peace out!
Friday, June 03, 2016
Everybody Up! 7 - Of The Can, And How To Can It
6. DANA GILLESPIE "Andy Warhol"
Jesus. I came back for this?
Now, you may think I'm calling automatic Bowie Blasphemy on this one. It's not the case that I criticise Bowie covers without prejudice - I've just had my head blown off by Girl In A Coma's version of "As The World Falls Down", for instance, and I don't even like that song when Bowie does it - but this one adds many, many bells and whistles, which only serve to take away from the beautiful simplicity of the original.
In other words, the very worst kind of cover version. Mind you, Bowie himself is producing and Mick Ronson (more on him very soon) is playing guitar, so they must have approved on some level. Perhaps the contrast between the two versions would be found interesting and admirable, but...
Ah, I just don't get it. That's probably the kindest way to put it. I think knowing that the song was in some way an expression of Bowie's disappointment at meeting someone he admired very much and having a poor experience means that dressing this in the gaudy baubles of pop just leaves me a bit cold.
7. SUZI QUATRO "Can The Can"
Not to be confused with the 1980's mixed fruit flavoured carbonated drink of (half) the same name - yes, we all enjoyed a tin of Suzi back in the day oh my God did I really just crack that joke that was utterly pathetic - this is arguably Ms Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink's best remembered offering. Well, this or "Devil Gate Drive".
Leaving aside for a minute whether the song is good or not, it does raise the question of how one cans a can, and whether it is, in fact, advantageous to do so. "Canning" foods in a metal vessel that, in the UK anyway, is usually made of tin, helps to preserve the freshness and edibility of the contents. So we have two possible interpretations here:
1) that to "can the can", one must place a tin can inside another tin can;
2) that to "can the can", one must place a tin can full of food inside another tin can.
I think option 2 is more is more plausible, given that there's little point in preserving an empty tin can - unless goats took over the Earth, and wanted to keep the metal that they would be eating fresh by encasing it in other metal. Though being goats, they'd probably just eat both. And anyway, goats haven't taken over the Earth. Goats taking over the Earth? We're trying to have an intellectual conversation here. Stop being silly.
Now, what would the motivation behind double-canning an already-canned foodstuff be? One has to think that there could only be two of these as well:
1) a boost in preservation power;
2) increased security.
Again, we can rule one of these out immediately. Anybody that can get into one can possesses the technology to get into two; unless someone's invented some kind of super security can, with lasers or something. And that's a stupid idea. Why did you come up with that idea, idiot? We're having a serious conversation here about canning cans, and you're bogging me down with some nonsense about security cans? Just... Just drop it, OK?
So there you have it: by a process of elimination, canning the can involves boosting the preservative power of a tin can of food by placing it into another can. Perfectly sensible; no goats, no security cans (security cans - pah!), nothing but the very sensible idea of canning canned food. And by a scientific process of elimination, that's what this song must be all about!
Oh yeah, it's quite good as well. But "Devil Gate Drive" is better, so they should have put that one on instead. Then we wouldn't have had to have that whole business about what canning the can is.
8. THE NEW YORK DOLLS "Looking For A Kiss"
Unlike my excoriations of Lou Reed, my criticisms of The New York Dolls are underpinned with a certain melancholy. I should like this band - why don't I? When I heard their reputation and read of their antics, I felt certain I would like them; I feel like I've failed myself in some way by not doing so.
I like plenty of image-over-music, ramshackle, arguably tone deaf, confrontational and heavily made-up bands. If I didn't like those qualities, I'd be unable to appreciate such of my heroes as These Animal Men, Billy Childish, Guitar Wolf, S*M*A*S*H or Manic Street Preachers - and that's clearly not the case.
Maybe it's because I know what came next - that they were about to be beaten at their own game of spectacle and establishment-baiting by the original UK punk scene, and even some of their US counterparts. For whatever reason though, they have failed to get under my skin.
Which means the only question I can really answer is: where does this stand in the huge category of The Three Songs I Know By The New York Dolls? And the answer is: second. Worse than "Trash", better than "Jet Boy".
9. NAZARETH "This Flight Tonight"
Scottish band Nazareth may not be quintessentially glam, but you can't deny there are sections of this offering that definitely show the hallmarks thereof; the chugging, insistent rhythm, the breakdown with handclaps, the talk of falling stars and starlight and whatnot.
Therefore what we have here is not so much a glam artefact per se, then, but a driving piece of classic rock, and one which fits in surprisingly well. It's also a Joni Mitchell cover, which is a bit of a surprise, as it's certainly up to rockin' speed here. My only complaint? It's a bit anonymous in this company, suffering by association with better suited and realised pieces nearby.
Which brings us nicely up to...
10. SWEET "Ballroom Blitz"
Or Tia Carrere's best song from "Wayne's World", for people of my ever advancing age... On a slight tangent, a recent rewatch of said film showed me that the band The Jolly Green Giants can be spotted leaving the stage at the club, actually dressed as the outsized sweetcorn-shilling mascot.
See, who needs new things? Old things are best.
Anyway: what a tune. Approaching - but not matching, for what could - the sheer mania of "Crazy Horses" with its tale of a concert audience turning horrendously savage, it has a great combination of shoutability and a feeling of it being very barely controlled itself, making the music a great match for the message.
And what of Tia Carrere? She managed to piggyback on Lara Croft-mania by playing a suspiciously familiar stereotype of a female action archaeologist in a show called "Relic Hunter", which if you were jobless in the early 2000s you may have seen far too much of on Sky. If you take anything away from this review let it be this: it's really frustrating when you enjoy a song but have little or nothing to say about it.
So far, nearly all good for disk two so far then; much cause for optimism which I'm sure is well founded. Goodnight, America! Great to be back!
Join us next time for... What?... Who?... (sigh). This won't be a good one. I don't mind if you skip it. The one after's got Alvin Stardust though, so don't miss that!
Jesus. I came back for this?
Now, you may think I'm calling automatic Bowie Blasphemy on this one. It's not the case that I criticise Bowie covers without prejudice - I've just had my head blown off by Girl In A Coma's version of "As The World Falls Down", for instance, and I don't even like that song when Bowie does it - but this one adds many, many bells and whistles, which only serve to take away from the beautiful simplicity of the original.
In other words, the very worst kind of cover version. Mind you, Bowie himself is producing and Mick Ronson (more on him very soon) is playing guitar, so they must have approved on some level. Perhaps the contrast between the two versions would be found interesting and admirable, but...
Ah, I just don't get it. That's probably the kindest way to put it. I think knowing that the song was in some way an expression of Bowie's disappointment at meeting someone he admired very much and having a poor experience means that dressing this in the gaudy baubles of pop just leaves me a bit cold.
7. SUZI QUATRO "Can The Can"
Not to be confused with the 1980's mixed fruit flavoured carbonated drink of (half) the same name - yes, we all enjoyed a tin of Suzi back in the day oh my God did I really just crack that joke that was utterly pathetic - this is arguably Ms Fruit-Flavoured Carbonated Drink's best remembered offering. Well, this or "Devil Gate Drive".
Leaving aside for a minute whether the song is good or not, it does raise the question of how one cans a can, and whether it is, in fact, advantageous to do so. "Canning" foods in a metal vessel that, in the UK anyway, is usually made of tin, helps to preserve the freshness and edibility of the contents. So we have two possible interpretations here:
1) that to "can the can", one must place a tin can inside another tin can;
2) that to "can the can", one must place a tin can full of food inside another tin can.
I think option 2 is more is more plausible, given that there's little point in preserving an empty tin can - unless goats took over the Earth, and wanted to keep the metal that they would be eating fresh by encasing it in other metal. Though being goats, they'd probably just eat both. And anyway, goats haven't taken over the Earth. Goats taking over the Earth? We're trying to have an intellectual conversation here. Stop being silly.
Now, what would the motivation behind double-canning an already-canned foodstuff be? One has to think that there could only be two of these as well:
1) a boost in preservation power;
2) increased security.
Again, we can rule one of these out immediately. Anybody that can get into one can possesses the technology to get into two; unless someone's invented some kind of super security can, with lasers or something. And that's a stupid idea. Why did you come up with that idea, idiot? We're having a serious conversation here about canning cans, and you're bogging me down with some nonsense about security cans? Just... Just drop it, OK?
So there you have it: by a process of elimination, canning the can involves boosting the preservative power of a tin can of food by placing it into another can. Perfectly sensible; no goats, no security cans (security cans - pah!), nothing but the very sensible idea of canning canned food. And by a scientific process of elimination, that's what this song must be all about!
Oh yeah, it's quite good as well. But "Devil Gate Drive" is better, so they should have put that one on instead. Then we wouldn't have had to have that whole business about what canning the can is.
8. THE NEW YORK DOLLS "Looking For A Kiss"
Unlike my excoriations of Lou Reed, my criticisms of The New York Dolls are underpinned with a certain melancholy. I should like this band - why don't I? When I heard their reputation and read of their antics, I felt certain I would like them; I feel like I've failed myself in some way by not doing so.
I like plenty of image-over-music, ramshackle, arguably tone deaf, confrontational and heavily made-up bands. If I didn't like those qualities, I'd be unable to appreciate such of my heroes as These Animal Men, Billy Childish, Guitar Wolf, S*M*A*S*H or Manic Street Preachers - and that's clearly not the case.
Maybe it's because I know what came next - that they were about to be beaten at their own game of spectacle and establishment-baiting by the original UK punk scene, and even some of their US counterparts. For whatever reason though, they have failed to get under my skin.
Which means the only question I can really answer is: where does this stand in the huge category of The Three Songs I Know By The New York Dolls? And the answer is: second. Worse than "Trash", better than "Jet Boy".
9. NAZARETH "This Flight Tonight"
Scottish band Nazareth may not be quintessentially glam, but you can't deny there are sections of this offering that definitely show the hallmarks thereof; the chugging, insistent rhythm, the breakdown with handclaps, the talk of falling stars and starlight and whatnot.
Therefore what we have here is not so much a glam artefact per se, then, but a driving piece of classic rock, and one which fits in surprisingly well. It's also a Joni Mitchell cover, which is a bit of a surprise, as it's certainly up to rockin' speed here. My only complaint? It's a bit anonymous in this company, suffering by association with better suited and realised pieces nearby.
Which brings us nicely up to...
10. SWEET "Ballroom Blitz"
Or Tia Carrere's best song from "Wayne's World", for people of my ever advancing age... On a slight tangent, a recent rewatch of said film showed me that the band The Jolly Green Giants can be spotted leaving the stage at the club, actually dressed as the outsized sweetcorn-shilling mascot.
See, who needs new things? Old things are best.
Anyway: what a tune. Approaching - but not matching, for what could - the sheer mania of "Crazy Horses" with its tale of a concert audience turning horrendously savage, it has a great combination of shoutability and a feeling of it being very barely controlled itself, making the music a great match for the message.
And what of Tia Carrere? She managed to piggyback on Lara Croft-mania by playing a suspiciously familiar stereotype of a female action archaeologist in a show called "Relic Hunter", which if you were jobless in the early 2000s you may have seen far too much of on Sky. If you take anything away from this review let it be this: it's really frustrating when you enjoy a song but have little or nothing to say about it.
So far, nearly all good for disk two so far then; much cause for optimism which I'm sure is well founded. Goodnight, America! Great to be back!
Join us next time for... What?... Who?... (sigh). This won't be a good one. I don't mind if you skip it. The one after's got Alvin Stardust though, so don't miss that!
Sunday, January 17, 2016
A Godawful Small Affair: Twenty-Six "Blackstar"
"BLACKSTAR" (2016)
THE COVER: I wish I could present this without further comment, but for the sake of continuity it's worth noting that the vinyl version is actually black on black. It's so black, it's like, "how much more black could this be?" The answer is none. None more black.
What I can say about it is that I thought it was essentially throwaway pretension on the first listen and got that quite wrong; it's a grower that has at least three genuinely great moments in, moments earned by the journey that gets you there and that justify the sheer length of the piece, which remains an anomaly in rock or pop music. I also find it helps to think of it as three separate movements; indeed its closest touchpoint in the oeuvre is probably "Sweet Thing"/"Candidate"/"Sweet Thing (Reprise)" from "Diamond Dogs".
The one slight here - the "TVC15" of the album, if you will - is "Girl Loves Me", which is partially sung in a combination of invented languages. It has been criticised in some areas of the press for containing swearing, about which I really couldn't care less; I just think it's a slightly less interesting and more repetitive trudge through the musical themes of the album. Much like "TVC15" though, I bet Bowie was well pleased with it.
All in all the album was far more exciting and forward-looking than you would expect of any 69-year old's artistic output, and left us all wondering was next, and what, if anything, was there left to achieve? That's the funny thing about life, though: as long as you're still alive, there's always one thing left to do.
And so this time we really do come to a rather final halt; no new albums will there be, no rumoured demoes will I countenance, no further entries for Extra Credit, no peachy prayers, no return for the Thin White Duke.
Which means I should probably try and have a stab at putting my personal admiration for David Bowie into a few inadequate words. Where do I start with this one?
Firstly I would say that I haven't ever seen so many people that I care about be so perturbed by the passing of a stranger. I think the reaction to Michael Jackson's death was probably fired by more people, as he was the larger international star, but in terms of people that I specifically share relationships with this was a real hammerblow.
Obviously people react to this in different ways; I and my contemporaries Tim and Ben are blogging. Another friend put on a tribute night that amped up the attendees to the point the police were called. Many have taken to social media to express a dislike of cancer. Whilst I may feel the latter sentiment can go assumed and unexpressed, it's a valid way of assimilating the news, and yet more proof of its wide reach.
Secondly I would say that part of the reason his death has such resonance, and particularly in close proximity to releasing an album this eclectic and future focused, is that there is a genuine fear that there won't ever be another artist like David Bowie; someone who is left largely to his own devices by the recording industry to the extent that he is able to repeatedly inspire consecutive generations of people by adjusting his focus, rather than being encouraged to stick to a familiar formula that can be marketed in a set way.
Frankly, I personally think that this is the case, due to the changes in the industry since the sixties; the immediate post-Beatles landscape legitimised experimental and chameleonic acts, but the return of the rock dinosaurs post-Live Aid, the culture of big band reformation and how it has almost split the industry into two parts, not to mention the Internet, which has freed artists to be heard but also freed them from any hope of making any bloody money out of it, limits the possibility of this happening again.
But then again, I'm getting old. I wouldn't know the new Bowie if I saw it, as I'd be too busy deriding it for not being the old one.
Finally, it's made me realise how inextricably Bowie's music has been woven into my life, and how many of my significant memories are tied in to it, including of course seeing him in person at Phoenix 1996 (full-on Outside era noise with some classics thrown in for good effect) and Glastonbury 2000 (all-out greatest hits, with a particular focus on "Station To Station" for no apparent reason).
Then there's the first dance at my wedding ("Let's Dance", obviously); the time I performed "Starman" in Karaoke Bar Champion on the outskirts of Golden Gai in Shinjuku, Tokyo; the many Bowie covers of popular beat combo The Eighteenth/Desperate Living, including but not limited to "Jump They Say" and "Heroes"; singing harmonies on "Space Oddity" with my mother shortly before leaving home; or any of a hundred heated debates at Orme Watch HQ.
Essentially in closing, I apologise for my hypocrisy. For years I have said that we shouldn't be sad when an ageing celebrity who's had what appears to be an excellent life dies. However: now I am sad. But good lord, what a legacy to celebrate, and I'm glad I got a chance to do it in some small way.
THE END
THE COVER: I wish I could present this without further comment, but for the sake of continuity it's worth noting that the vinyl version is actually black on black. It's so black, it's like, "how much more black could this be?" The answer is none. None more black.
A confession: I did not expect to be writing this. I assumed "The Next Day" was a retirement album, one last jolly before liberating obscurity. Then unexpectedly - and perhaps now in context, suspiciously - a new, extremely confusing ten minute single was released.
We now know that the new, less conventionally-structured songs on this album owe much to Bowie's decision to work with musicians who were more familiar with jazz than pop, meaning that the natural constraints of rock music are lifted, and the listener is offered a more challenging yet equally rewarding experience.
I didn't listen to "Blackstar" the song more than once before the album came out, figuring I didn't have to; buying the album was my default position, what I had heard was at least enough to convince me it was more interesting than, say, "Tonight", so there really wasn't much point.
What I can say about it is that I thought it was essentially throwaway pretension on the first listen and got that quite wrong; it's a grower that has at least three genuinely great moments in, moments earned by the journey that gets you there and that justify the sheer length of the piece, which remains an anomaly in rock or pop music. I also find it helps to think of it as three separate movements; indeed its closest touchpoint in the oeuvre is probably "Sweet Thing"/"Candidate"/"Sweet Thing (Reprise)" from "Diamond Dogs".
So track one's in the bag. What else have we got? Well, "'Tis a Pity She Was A Whore" is my particular favourite - but then it would be; whilst much of the album takes obvious cues from Bowie's unfairly maligned nineties output (the unrestrained saxophony of "Black Tie White Noise", the pummelling intensity of "1. Outside", the joyous, scrambling beats of "Earthling"), this is a track you could easily drop onto any of those albums.
"Lazarus", now lent new context (we're getting to that), "Dollar Days" and closer "I Can't Give Everything Away" are the more classically Bowie tracks, in so far as he has a classic sound; they ring with the confidence of "Heathen" and "Reality", but shorn of the more traditional cladding of those albums they fly with the abandon of the new, sounding as vital as any of his material has.
The one slight here - the "TVC15" of the album, if you will - is "Girl Loves Me", which is partially sung in a combination of invented languages. It has been criticised in some areas of the press for containing swearing, about which I really couldn't care less; I just think it's a slightly less interesting and more repetitive trudge through the musical themes of the album. Much like "TVC15" though, I bet Bowie was well pleased with it.
All in all the album was far more exciting and forward-looking than you would expect of any 69-year old's artistic output, and left us all wondering was next, and what, if anything, was there left to achieve? That's the funny thing about life, though: as long as you're still alive, there's always one thing left to do.
And so this time we really do come to a rather final halt; no new albums will there be, no rumoured demoes will I countenance, no further entries for Extra Credit, no peachy prayers, no return for the Thin White Duke.
Which means I should probably try and have a stab at putting my personal admiration for David Bowie into a few inadequate words. Where do I start with this one?
Firstly I would say that I haven't ever seen so many people that I care about be so perturbed by the passing of a stranger. I think the reaction to Michael Jackson's death was probably fired by more people, as he was the larger international star, but in terms of people that I specifically share relationships with this was a real hammerblow.
Obviously people react to this in different ways; I and my contemporaries Tim and Ben are blogging. Another friend put on a tribute night that amped up the attendees to the point the police were called. Many have taken to social media to express a dislike of cancer. Whilst I may feel the latter sentiment can go assumed and unexpressed, it's a valid way of assimilating the news, and yet more proof of its wide reach.
Secondly I would say that part of the reason his death has such resonance, and particularly in close proximity to releasing an album this eclectic and future focused, is that there is a genuine fear that there won't ever be another artist like David Bowie; someone who is left largely to his own devices by the recording industry to the extent that he is able to repeatedly inspire consecutive generations of people by adjusting his focus, rather than being encouraged to stick to a familiar formula that can be marketed in a set way.
Frankly, I personally think that this is the case, due to the changes in the industry since the sixties; the immediate post-Beatles landscape legitimised experimental and chameleonic acts, but the return of the rock dinosaurs post-Live Aid, the culture of big band reformation and how it has almost split the industry into two parts, not to mention the Internet, which has freed artists to be heard but also freed them from any hope of making any bloody money out of it, limits the possibility of this happening again.
But then again, I'm getting old. I wouldn't know the new Bowie if I saw it, as I'd be too busy deriding it for not being the old one.
Finally, it's made me realise how inextricably Bowie's music has been woven into my life, and how many of my significant memories are tied in to it, including of course seeing him in person at Phoenix 1996 (full-on Outside era noise with some classics thrown in for good effect) and Glastonbury 2000 (all-out greatest hits, with a particular focus on "Station To Station" for no apparent reason).
Then there's the first dance at my wedding ("Let's Dance", obviously); the time I performed "Starman" in Karaoke Bar Champion on the outskirts of Golden Gai in Shinjuku, Tokyo; the many Bowie covers of popular beat combo The Eighteenth/Desperate Living, including but not limited to "Jump They Say" and "Heroes"; singing harmonies on "Space Oddity" with my mother shortly before leaving home; or any of a hundred heated debates at Orme Watch HQ.
Essentially in closing, I apologise for my hypocrisy. For years I have said that we shouldn't be sad when an ageing celebrity who's had what appears to be an excellent life dies. However: now I am sad. But good lord, what a legacy to celebrate, and I'm glad I got a chance to do it in some small way.
THE END
Wednesday, September 16, 2015
Everybody Up! 6 - He Drove The Fastest Painty-Can Cart In The West
DISK TWO
1. MOTT THE HOOPLE "All The Young Dudes"
# He can kick like a mule, its a real mean team, but we can love; oh yes, we can love...
Yay! A friend of mine once introduced me to the concept of cheering when a character in a film says the name of the film, which has stuck ever since, and of course occurred to me in this situation. Note that the less appropriate the timing of the cheer, the more satisfying this little game becomes (see: "Secrets and Lies").
I don't really think you need me to run this one down for you; Bowie wrote this for Mott, who were somewhat in the doldrums at the time. It provided a shot in the arm for them - and later a new guitarist in the form of Mick Ronson - but so Bowie is the song that it's odd hearing another artist do it, even if they did do it first, and Bowie's never really managed to get a good version on record.
Thus begins a skull-crushing parade of glam's greatest hits, best enjoyed at bowel-rattling volume with a - hang on a minute... That sounds like...
OH NO PLEASE GOD NO NOT AGA-
2. LOU REED "Walk on The Wild Side"
Sigh. Here comes ol' painty-can Lou Reed, again, to ruin everything, again.
Yes, here's every apologist's nightmare - arguably your artist's biggest song, which sounded "exotic" at the time, turns out when viewed through modern society's unforgiving prism to be full of outmoded and borderline insulting language, unfortunately targeted at a minority whose causes are just starting to come into sharp focus.
It's also boring as fuck, though the clever production on the backing vocals through what must be, by a process of elimination, the "chorus" is actually pretty good. This still falls foul of one of the fundamental rules of the universe: when PJ And Duncan's version of a song improves upon it in every conceivable way, you have a problem.
Finally, to quote a very underrated writer, "the best that can be said for an artefact of this level of throwaway frivolity and outmoded prejudice is that human morality's inexorable progress has rendered this almost impossible to judge by modern standards" - which either makes Lou Reed the American Noel Coward, or Noel Coward the English Lou Reed (delete as applicable). Either way, one thing is undeniable: Lou Reed's garage contained many half-finished cans of paint.
3. ROXY MUSIC "Virginia Plain"
Not that I'm necessarily saying that Eno doesn't have a stash of Crown's finest, probably all in slightly differently named shades of white, but at least his painty-can-ness tends to manifest in ground-breaking or entertaining fashion - note that's not an and/or, as he doesn't quite seemed to have mastered doing both at once.
This track is great, and features probably the best use of oboe in rock. In fact, are there any other high profile uses of the oboe in rock? Answers on a postcard. We'll be hearing from Byron Ferrari again later on, but unfortunately it will be a bit less exciting than this offering; it's easy to underestimate how exciting and progressive Roxy Music must have sounded at the time, particularly in the context of mainstream pop.
Thus (truly) begins a skull-crushing parade of glam's greatest hits, best enjoyed at bowel-rattling volume with a Midlands-brewed beer in hand and one of them hats like Noddy Holder had perched atop yer head. Come on, let's feel the noise!
4. T-REX "Metal Guru"
BOSH! Top of the shop.
It's all in the walk. The walk I do when this song comes on tells me everything I need to know about the song. It's not a strut, it's not a swagger, but it's supremely confident. There's even some swish in the hips, a less masculine quality that bubbles to the surface, sensing a lack of fear, the absolute steely focus that the beat and screeching that hails the arrival of this song instils in me.
It is solid, it is unstoppable, it probably looks really bloody stupid on a Tuesday afternoon in a machine-washable Primark suit, whilst trying to rush back to work with a Tesco meal deal in one hand and a permanently buzzing mobile phone in the other, but damn it if it isn't a great, great deal of fun - even if nobody seems to know exactly what a Metal Guru is.
5. THE OSMONDS "Crazy Horses"
First off: not glam rock. Not anywhere near. However, what a track. Seriously; for all my espousing of Digital Hardcore acts, mid-nineties Touch & Go Records alumni and ear-scorching Japanese punks, this may be one of the most extreme tracks in my collection.
Bear in mind that this is The Osmonds - the Mormon, perennial goody-two-shoeses of the seventies music industry - producing an extremely loud rock song. By modern day standards, with the jaded, seen-it-all attitude of these bloody millenials, it's the equivalent of One Direction torching an orphanage and releasing the screams as a single.
Featuring a riff that can only be described as "metal", a spacey synthesiser and a dangerously berserk, shout-until-you're-hoarse (pun intended, always) vocal about killer horses taking over the world, or something. The saxophone towards the end derails it a bit but it's too late by then - your mind may well have been blown.
In short, avoid judging this book by its cover; unlike certain other snooze-worthy offerings by certain Dulux-collecting "legends" we've recently encountered, this snaps, crackles and pops with an undercurrent of genuine danger.
Join us next time when we'll be looking for a kiss and trying to work out how one cans a can.
1. MOTT THE HOOPLE "All The Young Dudes"
# He can kick like a mule, its a real mean team, but we can love; oh yes, we can love...
Yay! A friend of mine once introduced me to the concept of cheering when a character in a film says the name of the film, which has stuck ever since, and of course occurred to me in this situation. Note that the less appropriate the timing of the cheer, the more satisfying this little game becomes (see: "Secrets and Lies").
I don't really think you need me to run this one down for you; Bowie wrote this for Mott, who were somewhat in the doldrums at the time. It provided a shot in the arm for them - and later a new guitarist in the form of Mick Ronson - but so Bowie is the song that it's odd hearing another artist do it, even if they did do it first, and Bowie's never really managed to get a good version on record.
Thus begins a skull-crushing parade of glam's greatest hits, best enjoyed at bowel-rattling volume with a - hang on a minute... That sounds like...
OH NO PLEASE GOD NO NOT AGA-
2. LOU REED "Walk on The Wild Side"
Sigh. Here comes ol' painty-can Lou Reed, again, to ruin everything, again.
Yes, here's every apologist's nightmare - arguably your artist's biggest song, which sounded "exotic" at the time, turns out when viewed through modern society's unforgiving prism to be full of outmoded and borderline insulting language, unfortunately targeted at a minority whose causes are just starting to come into sharp focus.
It's also boring as fuck, though the clever production on the backing vocals through what must be, by a process of elimination, the "chorus" is actually pretty good. This still falls foul of one of the fundamental rules of the universe: when PJ And Duncan's version of a song improves upon it in every conceivable way, you have a problem.
Finally, to quote a very underrated writer, "the best that can be said for an artefact of this level of throwaway frivolity and outmoded prejudice is that human morality's inexorable progress has rendered this almost impossible to judge by modern standards" - which either makes Lou Reed the American Noel Coward, or Noel Coward the English Lou Reed (delete as applicable). Either way, one thing is undeniable: Lou Reed's garage contained many half-finished cans of paint.
3. ROXY MUSIC "Virginia Plain"
Not that I'm necessarily saying that Eno doesn't have a stash of Crown's finest, probably all in slightly differently named shades of white, but at least his painty-can-ness tends to manifest in ground-breaking or entertaining fashion - note that's not an and/or, as he doesn't quite seemed to have mastered doing both at once.
This track is great, and features probably the best use of oboe in rock. In fact, are there any other high profile uses of the oboe in rock? Answers on a postcard. We'll be hearing from Byron Ferrari again later on, but unfortunately it will be a bit less exciting than this offering; it's easy to underestimate how exciting and progressive Roxy Music must have sounded at the time, particularly in the context of mainstream pop.
Thus (truly) begins a skull-crushing parade of glam's greatest hits, best enjoyed at bowel-rattling volume with a Midlands-brewed beer in hand and one of them hats like Noddy Holder had perched atop yer head. Come on, let's feel the noise!
4. T-REX "Metal Guru"
BOSH! Top of the shop.
It's all in the walk. The walk I do when this song comes on tells me everything I need to know about the song. It's not a strut, it's not a swagger, but it's supremely confident. There's even some swish in the hips, a less masculine quality that bubbles to the surface, sensing a lack of fear, the absolute steely focus that the beat and screeching that hails the arrival of this song instils in me.
It is solid, it is unstoppable, it probably looks really bloody stupid on a Tuesday afternoon in a machine-washable Primark suit, whilst trying to rush back to work with a Tesco meal deal in one hand and a permanently buzzing mobile phone in the other, but damn it if it isn't a great, great deal of fun - even if nobody seems to know exactly what a Metal Guru is.
5. THE OSMONDS "Crazy Horses"
First off: not glam rock. Not anywhere near. However, what a track. Seriously; for all my espousing of Digital Hardcore acts, mid-nineties Touch & Go Records alumni and ear-scorching Japanese punks, this may be one of the most extreme tracks in my collection.
Bear in mind that this is The Osmonds - the Mormon, perennial goody-two-shoeses of the seventies music industry - producing an extremely loud rock song. By modern day standards, with the jaded, seen-it-all attitude of these bloody millenials, it's the equivalent of One Direction torching an orphanage and releasing the screams as a single.
Featuring a riff that can only be described as "metal", a spacey synthesiser and a dangerously berserk, shout-until-you're-hoarse (pun intended, always) vocal about killer horses taking over the world, or something. The saxophone towards the end derails it a bit but it's too late by then - your mind may well have been blown.
In short, avoid judging this book by its cover; unlike certain other snooze-worthy offerings by certain Dulux-collecting "legends" we've recently encountered, this snaps, crackles and pops with an undercurrent of genuine danger.
Join us next time when we'll be looking for a kiss and trying to work out how one cans a can.
Sunday, September 13, 2015
Everybody Up! 5 - Two for Sorrow, Three for Joy
1-17. FANNY "Charity Ball"
Cor! I'd love me some no sorry I'm not doing this bit. Next.
1-18. THE MURGATROYD BAND "Magpie"
A song this writer is more than familiar with, thanks to Radcliffe favourites and nostalgia specialists before it was cool The Adventures of Parsley, who dropped a version in the mid-nineties, when the arrival of Supergrass briefly convinced everyone that the seventies were coming back in a big way - which was halted two seconds later after Oasis' dominance meant it was time to dig out your parka and stick some Weller on. Again.
(Anyone who says I'm old enough to remember the show itself is a communist.)
Magpie the show was ITV's attempt to do something along the lines of the BBC favourite Blue Peter, but with a remit to be a bit more groovy, man. The main impact it has had on myself is as an afterthought in the sets of stand-up comedians of a certain age, about how they either weren't allowed to watch Magpie because it was on ITV, or made a point of watching it because it was on ITV. In some cases this would take up hours of said material, only stopping for Jack Dee to say "Mojo" in a voice he presumably believed to be funny.
Whilst ostensibly being recorded by The Murgatroyd Band, named for the show's magpie mascot, the group largely consists of members of The Spencer Davis Group, such as Spencer Davis. So I've learned something today. Anyway, the song itself is pretty good; strangely hypnotic, but with an odd feeling of it only being very barely controlled - like it might set its controls for the heart of the sun at any moment, and plough off into mind-expanding bad trip territory, assumedly taking the watching kiddies with them.
1-19. CHICORY TIP "Son Of My Father"
Oh good lord. Well I already skipped Fanny, so I'll have to have a go at this one.
Chicory Tip, who were known as Chicory in the USA (still not as bad as The London Suede - really, why would you go with that?), presented this English re-write of a German song and then did basically nothing else of worth. They had one album, but somehow have had five compilations of their oeuvre released. The only way to get the album on CD is, bizarrely, on Japanese import.
And by thunder, is it ever boring. One of the main reasons it took me a while to write up this next post was the sheer fear of having to find something to find about bloody Chicory bloody Tip with their bloody meandering bloody boring song. And then I realised: that. That's what I could say.
And everything was alright, forever after.
1-20. T-REX "Hot Love"
For years I did not know what this song was called. In fact I was about to accuse this of doing the classic Nirvana move of having a title with nothing to do with the lyrics, but luckily thought to Google it beforehand. I'm still going on record as saying it's well hidden for a song title.
The track itself seems oddly restrained compared to later offerings such as "20th Century Boy", but sounds like a nuclear war when taken against the earlier Tyrannosaurus Rex material - however, the greater historical significance (and I'm sure someone will be more than happy to correct me if I am wrong) is that Bolan's appearances on Top of the Pops to promote this very single are credited with bringing the glam look to the masses.
We'll be dropping in on Bolan again before very long. Whilst he may have provided the initial opening, others would arguably capitalise on it better, at least in the short term. Somewhere in Laahdahn town, Bowie, far from saying bye ta-ta as he promised us half a disk ago, was heading into space; any number of UK rockers were raiding their sisters' dressing tables; and in darkest Wolverhampton, some unlikely icons were shaping their sideburns...
1-21. SLADE "Coz I Luv You"
Disk One comes to an end with an appearance by a band who are synonymous with the mainstream vision of glam due to their outrageous outfits, despite not necessarily fitting the bill musically. For Slade were, at heart, a hard rock band - could they have been anything else, hailing from the West Midlands at that time? - it just took them a little while to get there.
And this song is a very interesting sidetrack before they got there. A classic pop song, with easily memorable lyrics, simply understood platitudes and an instantly recognisable guitar hook, this wasn't typical of Slade at the time, who were transitioning from their skinhead phase to something less overtly confrontational. In fact, when taken in tandem with the previous track, we're on a run of songs that kickstarted fluctuating careers and in retrospect don't exactly fit with the modern expectations of those acts.
This was very much a case of cometh the hour, cometh the band, and the production does just enough to keep the boiling rage under wraps, which would actually no longer be necessary after this hit number one and the UK embraced Slade's more raucous anthems. We can argue all day about whether they'd have done it on merit without adopting the visual tropes established by Bolan, but that
would be pointless, and I've stuff to do.
And that ends disk one for us! Join us next time for disk two, where we'll be cheering as the title of the album is sung, catching up with Byron Ferrari and trying to work out what a Metal Guru actually is. It's going to be great!... Hang on... Can you hear the rattle of paint cans?
Cor! I'd love me some no sorry I'm not doing this bit. Next.
1-18. THE MURGATROYD BAND "Magpie"
A song this writer is more than familiar with, thanks to Radcliffe favourites and nostalgia specialists before it was cool The Adventures of Parsley, who dropped a version in the mid-nineties, when the arrival of Supergrass briefly convinced everyone that the seventies were coming back in a big way - which was halted two seconds later after Oasis' dominance meant it was time to dig out your parka and stick some Weller on. Again.
(Anyone who says I'm old enough to remember the show itself is a communist.)
Magpie the show was ITV's attempt to do something along the lines of the BBC favourite Blue Peter, but with a remit to be a bit more groovy, man. The main impact it has had on myself is as an afterthought in the sets of stand-up comedians of a certain age, about how they either weren't allowed to watch Magpie because it was on ITV, or made a point of watching it because it was on ITV. In some cases this would take up hours of said material, only stopping for Jack Dee to say "Mojo" in a voice he presumably believed to be funny.
Whilst ostensibly being recorded by The Murgatroyd Band, named for the show's magpie mascot, the group largely consists of members of The Spencer Davis Group, such as Spencer Davis. So I've learned something today. Anyway, the song itself is pretty good; strangely hypnotic, but with an odd feeling of it only being very barely controlled - like it might set its controls for the heart of the sun at any moment, and plough off into mind-expanding bad trip territory, assumedly taking the watching kiddies with them.
1-19. CHICORY TIP "Son Of My Father"
Oh good lord. Well I already skipped Fanny, so I'll have to have a go at this one.
Chicory Tip, who were known as Chicory in the USA (still not as bad as The London Suede - really, why would you go with that?), presented this English re-write of a German song and then did basically nothing else of worth. They had one album, but somehow have had five compilations of their oeuvre released. The only way to get the album on CD is, bizarrely, on Japanese import.
And by thunder, is it ever boring. One of the main reasons it took me a while to write up this next post was the sheer fear of having to find something to find about bloody Chicory bloody Tip with their bloody meandering bloody boring song. And then I realised: that. That's what I could say.
And everything was alright, forever after.
1-20. T-REX "Hot Love"
For years I did not know what this song was called. In fact I was about to accuse this of doing the classic Nirvana move of having a title with nothing to do with the lyrics, but luckily thought to Google it beforehand. I'm still going on record as saying it's well hidden for a song title.
The track itself seems oddly restrained compared to later offerings such as "20th Century Boy", but sounds like a nuclear war when taken against the earlier Tyrannosaurus Rex material - however, the greater historical significance (and I'm sure someone will be more than happy to correct me if I am wrong) is that Bolan's appearances on Top of the Pops to promote this very single are credited with bringing the glam look to the masses.
We'll be dropping in on Bolan again before very long. Whilst he may have provided the initial opening, others would arguably capitalise on it better, at least in the short term. Somewhere in Laahdahn town, Bowie, far from saying bye ta-ta as he promised us half a disk ago, was heading into space; any number of UK rockers were raiding their sisters' dressing tables; and in darkest Wolverhampton, some unlikely icons were shaping their sideburns...
1-21. SLADE "Coz I Luv You"
Disk One comes to an end with an appearance by a band who are synonymous with the mainstream vision of glam due to their outrageous outfits, despite not necessarily fitting the bill musically. For Slade were, at heart, a hard rock band - could they have been anything else, hailing from the West Midlands at that time? - it just took them a little while to get there.
And this song is a very interesting sidetrack before they got there. A classic pop song, with easily memorable lyrics, simply understood platitudes and an instantly recognisable guitar hook, this wasn't typical of Slade at the time, who were transitioning from their skinhead phase to something less overtly confrontational. In fact, when taken in tandem with the previous track, we're on a run of songs that kickstarted fluctuating careers and in retrospect don't exactly fit with the modern expectations of those acts.
This was very much a case of cometh the hour, cometh the band, and the production does just enough to keep the boiling rage under wraps, which would actually no longer be necessary after this hit number one and the UK embraced Slade's more raucous anthems. We can argue all day about whether they'd have done it on merit without adopting the visual tropes established by Bolan, but that
would be pointless, and I've stuff to do.
And that ends disk one for us! Join us next time for disk two, where we'll be cheering as the title of the album is sung, catching up with Byron Ferrari and trying to work out what a Metal Guru actually is. It's going to be great!... Hang on... Can you hear the rattle of paint cans?
Monday, May 25, 2015
Everybody Up! 4 - It Tastes Just Like *CHERRY* Cola
1-12. THE STOOGES "1969"
Here we fucking go! The Psychedelic Stooges were part of Motor City's group of fantastic turn of the seventies rock acts, along with the MC5 and later Alice Cooper, who is oddly absent from this collection despite having a) definite glam links and b) some excellent tunes.
This is one of a number of tracks (about seven out of eight) on their debut album that are very tightly controlled up to a point, then go ape crazy at the end; second album "Fun House" dispensed with the tightly controlled bits altogether, and "Raw Power"... Good lord, "Raw Power". But that's another matter altogether.
An excellent blast of proto-punk, certainly, and from an act who took stage performances to a more theatrical level via Iggy's antics, its inclusion here essentially seems to hinge on their "Bowie Mates" status; a shame, really, as it doesn't seem massively relevant beyond that, which is a bit of a sad way to think of a brilliant song.
As we're about to find out, perceived relevance to the box's subject is a bit of an issue with the next few tracks - though I am at pains to refer you to the opening entry of this series, which did state that their relevance wouldn't be questioned, this is definitely a series of tracks that could have been lent extra context from tracks that could have been selected but for whatever reason were not, or where the artists may have been better represented by other selections. Again, it's all opinion - try not to take it too seriously.
1-13. THE KINKS "Lola"
And speaking immediately of which, here's a tune whose subject matter seems to have bought its berth, rather than being part of the featured musical lineage, which other Kinks songs may have fitted more comfortably into - "You Really Got Me", for instance, though its lazy (whilst probably true) assumed status as the genesis of heavy metal tends to rule it out of other considerations.
The problem here, said the lazy journalist, is that because of the two controversies of the lyrics - one being the Coca-Cola vs Cherry Cola storm in a teacup, the other the acknowledgement of transexuality/transvestism on a mainstream pop record, there's been an awful lot of writing about what is a perfectly serviceable but not musically ambitious record, meaning that I'll have to cut this particular entry short. Please accept the following picture of a weasel with our apologies.
1-14. HOTLEGS "Neanderthal Man"
Hotlegs are the answer to a question nobody asked: "what did 10CC do before they were 10CC?".
Loping along on a repetitive beat, showing a lack of imagination that would not be out of place from a Neanderthal man... Hang on, is that what they were trying to do? Did they invent hipster irony thirty-some odd years early? The world must know!
That possibility aside, this is pretty bad. Whilst it has merit as a musical curate's egg, given what the core staff would go on to achieve, I am of the unfortunate conclusion that this track marks the end of a good, if briefly Lou Reed-scarred, run of tracks; certainly the best we've had on the boxed set to date. So, what powerhouse of pre-glam will we get to re-energise us in the run towards the end of disk one?
1-15. BURUNDI STEIPHENSON BLACK "Burundi Black Part Two"
...What?
Seriously?
Here we have a 1971 track featuring the drumming of Burundi's Ingoma people, which would later influence seemingly everything Malcolm McLaren did post-Pistols. It... Well, it doesn't seem very relevant. I think some parallels are trying to be drawn here between the hypnotic, beat-perfect rhythms often employed by glam drummers and those used here, but it doesn't exactly ring true.
Whilst I know this is building to something, having listened to the other disks (um, spoilers, probably), I don't know what that is - "Tiger Feet", perhaps. There were probably tracks that could have been picked that would have made the case for this one a bit better, and I was genuinely surprised that Adam and the Ants don't make an appearance later, but that's not the set we got - so sadly I must consider this largely irrelevant.
1-16. CURVED AIR "Back Street Luv"
OK; much better. This kicks off with a mysterious space-rock intro and verse that I wish someone would play to Muse, though they're probably too busy making a new piece of iPad software to turn their spindly indie also-ran tunes into lost Queen songs, before shifting seamlessly into a higher tempo chorus - or what passes for a chorus, as the song is at the edge of traditional structure.
It's pretty damn good, which surprised me; I'm not sure if was getting them mixed up with someone else, but I distinctly remember looking at the back of the box and thinking 'Curved Air? I don't like Curved Air', with all the whininess of the barge driver from "Rosie and Jim" forlornly discovering that his mischievous woollen golems had tricked him into purchasing toffee yoghurt.
Bizarrely, this single got to number 4 in the UK singles chart, and none of their other singles did anything at all, though being in the psyche/prog end of things their albums were probably the main focus. If they take nothing else away from their career, they can at least say that a beleaguered blogger compared them favourably to Muse, and thanks them for breaking the cycle of odd inclusions; the space-age futurism employed here would definitely have an influence on glam, and it is definitely a good song. Hooray! Closing on a high!
Join us next time for Love, Luv and Fanny. And two others that don't form a part of a tenuous, childish piece of humour. (More's the pity)
Here we fucking go! The Psychedelic Stooges were part of Motor City's group of fantastic turn of the seventies rock acts, along with the MC5 and later Alice Cooper, who is oddly absent from this collection despite having a) definite glam links and b) some excellent tunes.
This is one of a number of tracks (about seven out of eight) on their debut album that are very tightly controlled up to a point, then go ape crazy at the end; second album "Fun House" dispensed with the tightly controlled bits altogether, and "Raw Power"... Good lord, "Raw Power". But that's another matter altogether.
An excellent blast of proto-punk, certainly, and from an act who took stage performances to a more theatrical level via Iggy's antics, its inclusion here essentially seems to hinge on their "Bowie Mates" status; a shame, really, as it doesn't seem massively relevant beyond that, which is a bit of a sad way to think of a brilliant song.
As we're about to find out, perceived relevance to the box's subject is a bit of an issue with the next few tracks - though I am at pains to refer you to the opening entry of this series, which did state that their relevance wouldn't be questioned, this is definitely a series of tracks that could have been lent extra context from tracks that could have been selected but for whatever reason were not, or where the artists may have been better represented by other selections. Again, it's all opinion - try not to take it too seriously.
1-13. THE KINKS "Lola"
And speaking immediately of which, here's a tune whose subject matter seems to have bought its berth, rather than being part of the featured musical lineage, which other Kinks songs may have fitted more comfortably into - "You Really Got Me", for instance, though its lazy (whilst probably true) assumed status as the genesis of heavy metal tends to rule it out of other considerations.
The problem here, said the lazy journalist, is that because of the two controversies of the lyrics - one being the Coca-Cola vs Cherry Cola storm in a teacup, the other the acknowledgement of transexuality/transvestism on a mainstream pop record, there's been an awful lot of writing about what is a perfectly serviceable but not musically ambitious record, meaning that I'll have to cut this particular entry short. Please accept the following picture of a weasel with our apologies.
1-14. HOTLEGS "Neanderthal Man"
Hotlegs are the answer to a question nobody asked: "what did 10CC do before they were 10CC?".
Loping along on a repetitive beat, showing a lack of imagination that would not be out of place from a Neanderthal man... Hang on, is that what they were trying to do? Did they invent hipster irony thirty-some odd years early? The world must know!
That possibility aside, this is pretty bad. Whilst it has merit as a musical curate's egg, given what the core staff would go on to achieve, I am of the unfortunate conclusion that this track marks the end of a good, if briefly Lou Reed-scarred, run of tracks; certainly the best we've had on the boxed set to date. So, what powerhouse of pre-glam will we get to re-energise us in the run towards the end of disk one?
1-15. BURUNDI STEIPHENSON BLACK "Burundi Black Part Two"
...What?
Seriously?
Here we have a 1971 track featuring the drumming of Burundi's Ingoma people, which would later influence seemingly everything Malcolm McLaren did post-Pistols. It... Well, it doesn't seem very relevant. I think some parallels are trying to be drawn here between the hypnotic, beat-perfect rhythms often employed by glam drummers and those used here, but it doesn't exactly ring true.
Whilst I know this is building to something, having listened to the other disks (um, spoilers, probably), I don't know what that is - "Tiger Feet", perhaps. There were probably tracks that could have been picked that would have made the case for this one a bit better, and I was genuinely surprised that Adam and the Ants don't make an appearance later, but that's not the set we got - so sadly I must consider this largely irrelevant.
1-16. CURVED AIR "Back Street Luv"
OK; much better. This kicks off with a mysterious space-rock intro and verse that I wish someone would play to Muse, though they're probably too busy making a new piece of iPad software to turn their spindly indie also-ran tunes into lost Queen songs, before shifting seamlessly into a higher tempo chorus - or what passes for a chorus, as the song is at the edge of traditional structure.
It's pretty damn good, which surprised me; I'm not sure if was getting them mixed up with someone else, but I distinctly remember looking at the back of the box and thinking 'Curved Air? I don't like Curved Air', with all the whininess of the barge driver from "Rosie and Jim" forlornly discovering that his mischievous woollen golems had tricked him into purchasing toffee yoghurt.
Bizarrely, this single got to number 4 in the UK singles chart, and none of their other singles did anything at all, though being in the psyche/prog end of things their albums were probably the main focus. If they take nothing else away from their career, they can at least say that a beleaguered blogger compared them favourably to Muse, and thanks them for breaking the cycle of odd inclusions; the space-age futurism employed here would definitely have an influence on glam, and it is definitely a good song. Hooray! Closing on a high!
Join us next time for Love, Luv and Fanny. And two others that don't form a part of a tenuous, childish piece of humour. (More's the pity)
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