"Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song"
First Broadcast: April 28, 1994
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| Courtesy 20th Century Fox, via Frinkiac. |
A BUNCH OF
STUFF THAT HAPPENED
Bart,
desperate to stand out in a ‘show and tell’ exercise awash with geodes, makes
the flawed but understandable decision to take his pet dog, Santa’s Little
Helper, into school. Whilst initially dismissed as some form of walking
clock, the dog is a huge hit with pupils and staff alike, until SLH escapes
into the school’s ventilation system in search of Grade F Meat,
leading Groundskeeper Willie to grease up and pursue him.
When that
situation spirals inevitably out of control, Principal Skinner is left carrying
the can with an enraged Superintendent Chalmers, who fires Skinner after
bearing the impact of a falling, greasy Scotsman. Ned Flanders steps into
the breach as principal, but his soft touch leads to absolute anarchy, whilst
Bart, shocked to be craving structure and rules, starts an unlikely friendship
with Skinner, who soon rejoins the US Army.
Bart decides
enough is enough, and with Homer on board – simply to take any chance to ruin
Flanders – he gets Skinner out of the army and brings Chalmers to the school to
view its fall from grace first hand. Initially unconcerned, Chalmers is
moved to fire Flanders when he hears him offer a prayer over the PA system, and
Skinner is rehired. No longer able to be friends, Skinner and Bart have
one last chat and depart to be kicked and taught, respectively.
MAGIC MOMENTS
One of the
greatest scenes in Simpsons history, period: Skinner’s synopsis of his great
American novel, “Billy And The Cloneasaurus”, and his subsequent castigation by
Apu.
A debut
appearance by one Luigi Risotto:
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| Courtesy 20th Century Fox, via Frinkiac. |
The chase
scene in the ventilation system, a loving tribute to “Alien”.
ALL SINGING,
ALL DANCING
Baadasssss
songs we do NOT have, here.
(*sigh*)
No; instead,
it is my solemn duty to report that our main musical moment this time is Joe
Cocker’s absolutely excruciating version of The Beatles’ “With A Little Help
From My Friends”, better known as the opening to the equally execrable
coming-of-age-very-very-slowly snorefest “The Wonder Years”.
I’m bloody not
putting that up though, so here’s the aria “Votre toast, je peux
vous le rendre“ from Bizet’s
“Carmen”, more popularly known as “The Toreador Song”, which is briefly hummed
by Martin Prince for, like, five seconds or something later in the episode. It is performed here by everybody's Siberian baritone, Mr Dmitri Hvorostovsky:
HISTORY/LEGACY
Armin
Tamzarian… (ducks many, many thrown items) Hey! It’s canon, don’t blame
me!... Was a Green Beret in the US Army, who saw action and imprisonment
in the Vietnam War, before moving to Springfield to take over his missing
Sergeant’s life in his absence, becoming Seymour Skinner. This was
revealed in Season Nine’s “The Principal And The Pauper”, an episode which is
itself called out in Season Eleven’s “Behind The Laughter” as a point where the
show’s golden reputation started to tarnish.
(Or maybe not,
as the episode “Boy Meets Curl” – which isn’t that bad, despite having a
curling gimmick and being in Season Twenty-One – depicts Seymour in Agnes’
womb… Maybe this is one of those ones where continuity simply doesn’t
work, and I need to dial back the urge to nerd a little.)
Skinner was there from the start and has appeared a great deal of times, given he works at Springfield Elementary and very few episodes don't include at least one scene there. His classics include a turn as the funny one in "Homer's Barbershop Quartet", his Terminator-esque chase down of Bart in "The Boy Who Knew Too Much" and his surprisingly tender romance with Edna Krabappel, as first kindled in "Grade School Confidential".
WHY I LIKE IT
Deliberately
picked to be the show’s 100th episode to be broadcast due to its
focus on Bart rather than Homer, thus harking back to the show’s early days as
a family-targetted Bart vehicle, this seems like a distillation of the early years - Bart prank, consequences, resolution, status quo - albeit one informed by the extra experience the show had picked up along the way.
The central
conflict/friendship between Bart and Seymour imbues this episode with a similar
core dynamic to “Homer Loves Flanders”, but it is further enlivened here by the
fringe characters – Ned just being Ned and applying Nedlike logic to a role he
is utterly unqualified for, and Skinner and Chalmers’ fantastic interplay,
which would become a must-see dynamic in later episodes, particularly where
steamed hams were involved.
This is an excellent romp that earns its more sentimental ending by keeping me rolling in the aisles throughout, and much like "Homer And Apu", gives us enough of a glimpse at a side character's life to develop them to full comedic potential - a potential that has been mined to great effect since. Just don't mention Armin Tamzarian again....
Join us next
time when we hand you a stark choice: Mountain Dew or Crab Juice?
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